Teaching ... myself

Ah, blog... my google therapist.  I am back for our yearly session. My Triabetes mentor, John, called me tonight... its been 5.5 years since we finished ironman together hand in hand.  We both live in different states now, he has twins that are 2.5 yrs old, my own kids have grown from babies to pre-pubescent, Ashley was pregnant with Esme when we last saw each other... When talking about our lives now, its amazing how they have changed.  I didn't even have a chicken at that time... now I am building a scaffold to butcher our steer.  And we both now have a child with diabetes.  John called me because I had texted him to tell him that last night we had our worst diabetes scare with Adia.  She was awfully close to seizing.  That look.  That F...ing look where your child's eyes look right through you to some far beyond that you can't reach and no matter what you say, she can't hear you.  She could still swallow and Ash had honey down her throat...

So... I'm 40 now. Its not that big a deal - mentally I am still such a child, so body and soul average out to somewhere in the late 20's I think. Today was such a really good day - and it all centered around wonderful wonderful food. Here is quick run down - an early morning wonderful tiramisu followed by a wonderful second period chocolate chip cookie cake made by the special education students... a gift that included one of the best hugs ever and a great "happy birthday" song. My second period enjoyed the cookie cake like nobody's business. Truman brought me a surprise chocolate cupcake in 3rd... then lunch began with flan from Luis. Hoffman, Luis, Jose, and I shared an amazing prima Genoa salami and perfect Italian bread and we ended it with amazing Babycakes cupcakes from Jose and Luis and Scott. At home the feast continued - Ash had smoked salmon on crackers, Gouda, guacamole and blue tortillas, prosciutto and sweet peppers, a nice mocha stout, then s...

Got to love blogger.... with FB around, a blog is like the private journal - where one can work out their junk or muse on life and it doesn't go on some timeline. So its Christmas Eve - and I have spent most of the year too busy... so that just about everything suffers a bit. I used to do fewer things barely well enough... now I do a whole lot more things barely well enough - which I accomplished by eliminating any selfish time spent on my health. For the past half-year, I really just forgot the lesson of Triabetes... essentially that I have to take care of myself and give it the priority that I give much of the other stuff in my life. I have started running again. I'm not knocking it out or anything, but I do find myself occasionally really really happy while plodding along some dark street. And that is a good thing. I'm also going through some bizarre period of massive change in my brain. As I close in on 20 again, I feel like I am finally fixing some stuff in me ...

Well, lookie lookie - even I haven't looked in forever - I think I will start again. Things I will talk about before too long: diabetic life (subsided to normal), Appalachian Teen Trekkers, homesteading, decisions, life in Glade Spring, Konnarock, and on and on. The kids are growing up...

CAT, TEST STRIP, CAT Ah, Halloween... the anti-diabetic holiday:) We actually had quite a beautiful time - Damascus is a wonderful community for our only community holiday. Life is becoming normal again. I talked to David M at the farmer's market today - he's in the club, you know... actually he is the president. What club you ask? The "I'm a diabetic and I have a diabetic kid" club. Its not one that I wanted to be in, but the company is quite enjoyable... good folk in the club. David has 3 type 1 kids. Imagine that. Adia is doing quite well - she is settling into the routine of being a diabetic - doesn't seem to mind the testing and shots are not that bad (she ain't beggin for them though). I was gathering wood with our dear neighbor Homer and I was telling him about Boo and I said that she will never know any different life - which is a blessing (well she might know a different life - we have been told to expect the cure in her lifetime... of course, I h...

Its 1:30am and I could be returning from a full moon hike with my buddy Shane, but it is way too early in the diagnosis to be sacrificing sleep.... which is ironic because here I am awake after I tested Adia (who was 155 - nice) because I am low (51 - not so nice). I've eaten but it will probably take me another hour to fall back asleep... at least tomorrow is friday. Thanks to those who have offered thoughts and support to me and my whole family through this thing. I never realized how helpful it is to hear that someone else cares. Adia is doing really great - we went to the Pediatric Endo on tuesday in Asheville and had a really good visit... however it took 3.5 hours! And that wasn't waiting around - various folk kept coming in to talk to us - CDE's, PA's etc. It was a well run show and we are pretty happy with Dr Artz. They are going to be our team, not just a doctor that tries to tell you what to do. My mom and dad met us there and watched Zoe and Esme... wh...

Well, its almost been a week since Adia's diagnosis... and time has effectively stopped. I remember the sight of the meter when I checked her and it was over 600... then blackout.... I remember the transfer in the ambulance to Johnson City - little Adia strapped into the gurney and asleep at 1am... I only barely remember the hospital stay - day and night blended - the occasional battle with the hospital staff (who were great, its just that a hospital is a terrible place to try to manage diabetes) - then we've been home for a few days I think. Today (and the last few days) I have been struggling with what I hope is fatigue ... I was sitting on the couch today seriously thinking that falling asleep would take too much effort. I was thinking of all the things I don't care about... milking the cow, feeding the chickens, bathing, getting off the couch.... HOWEVER, I am doing a bit better tonight. We went to the park and just being outside had the usual restorative effect. T...